Monday, June 02, 2014

24: LIVE ANOTHER DAY: Season 9: 4:00 p.m. – 5:00 p.m. Quick Review

"You are to give Jack Bauer whatever he needs." -President Heller

Jack asks for a car, silence AND Kate Morgan.

"Jack wants her, Jack needs her, JACK GETS HER!"

Pimpin.

Back at Chateau Bloodbath, Shadow Mom slaps her good kid across the face for second guessing her behavior (chopping off Simone's finger, killing Simone's husband in front of Simone). Don't you tell me how to be a loving mother (SLAP!) Shadow Mom then demands lovingly requests that Simone go and kill her dead husbands sister. Imagine marrying into this carnival of carnage.

Jack gets The Jack Sack™ back! Back in the field, back in black, back with Sack, oh hell yeah! Jack says hi to Audrey's husband, wastes two minutes talking to the guy and then he walks out the door to kick ass.

Only one man here has a sack
And then the episode goes all "crumpets, crumpets, etc." The English think Heller is senile. Great.

Bauer and Kate finally meet on equal terms. They talk professionalism. And then Jack reveals he's been working for a terrorist for the last 3 years. But of course, Bauer didn't turn evil; Jack was taking down the worst of the worst from the inside.

Ah crap, the Russians call Chief-in-Law. And now we learn that the weasel signed the President's name on a transfer order to send Bauer to Russia. Ah, no wonder he's been hiding around everything involving Jack. Wow, this is perfect.

And we finally get the official beginning of Jack & Kate- Jack explains his plan to get his terrorist contact to talk about Shadow Mom but it involves triple crosses and using Kate as a canary in the mineshaft. What the heck is Bauer talking about? Who cares, Kate's life is in danger and she wants it that way. Jack is attracted to this sort of thing.

Back at the CIA base, Mr. Julia Roberts suspiciously keeps IT Guy from doing something smart so no one can find out that Mr. Julia Roberts probably set up Kate and maybe her husband in that whole traitorous fiasco that forced Kate off everyone's Christmas list at Langley.  Plot thread has been established!

As for the Brits, they've got some thermal imaging that makes it look like Jack betrayed Kate ("Oi! He put his lady in the trunk!"), so they decide to send in one of their own teams to stop Jack. Oh, James Bond, don't you dare try to stop Jack. Jack and Kate (in the trunk) plus eight terrorists (I'm sorry, I hate myself for writing that) all start to get to know each other at some swanky warehouse adorned with rusty chains for curtains other lovely tetanus-causing hazards.  Jack's cockamamie plot to placate the terrorist who knows Shadow Mom is afoot!

Speaking of, Shadow Mom orders Simone to kill her sister-in-law and adorable daughter. Will she do it?

The gruesome interrogation of Kate begins. Kate resists. while Jack tries to get the terrorist to log into a sweet bank account full of money (or a computer virus, it's a Nigerian Lotto thing, you never know!). Kate is about to get a power drill to the head but the Brits storm the building to save her- nooo, they only care about capturing the terrorist. Kate says "Not a problem" and gets the drop on her torturer, killing him with all of her will (legs and a knife). OK, Jack hits "enter" to finally upliad the virus onto the terrorist's computer. Meanwhile, Kate kills some more and then lays back to take in the glorious carnage. And then the terrorist takes his own life when everyone thinks it's all done. Crap!

Luckily, Chloe's virus has derived some useful information. To a phone number, but who's? Maybe to Simone? Simone, you confused Pixie Killer.  She's got a knife under the table as her dead husband's sister asks "How's your marriage?" Simone tries to do the right thing and save her sister-in-law by telling her to run out of London, but the awkward sister-in-law relationship gets a tad more so when Simone accidentally stabs her instead. Ha! And now the little girl is on the run out of the apartment. A good Samaritan starts after Simone as the girl runs away from them both. As the kid is running in traffic, Simone gets hit by a bus and a pigeon flys away with all of the secrets.

Oh and that plot thread I mentioned earlier. Mr. Julie Roberts takes out a funny looking phone. And he calls his evil overlord. OK, thanks for that end scene. Ehh....


Clem is not impressed with that ending.

Tonight's episode feels rushed. I liked Jack and Kate finally having a pow-wow without 20 Marines about to shoot them. And of course, The Jack Sack™ is back, so we can all go back to buying the Classic Heavyweight Messenger Bag - IN BLACK!

See you next week!

3 comments:

Unknown said...

Yay!

I am liking Kate, She can handle her own shiz.

And Audrey even, especially after last week. Audrey ain't taking nobody's crap. This ain't Season 4 Audrey that's for sure.

Chief-in-Law forged that signature early on, now his plan has kinda been foiled and he's in a pickle.

I am DYING to know who was at the other end of Mr. Julia Robert's phone!!!!

And Clem is so pretty!

Dietcoke said...

I liked this episode because it reminded me of previous seasons that I liked, except that Kate became Jack and he was second fiddle.

There is a FRAKIN' MOLE????!!!!

Unknown said...

Knew it was Mr. Roberts. And guys, I'm calling this. Remember my prophecy. Jordan Reed, the CIA analyst, is so dead meat. Someone on the main cast is going to die, I think it's going to be him. Thank me for my future reading skills in a few weeks. ;D

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