Monday, February 27, 2017

24: LEGACY 4:00 p.m. - 5:00 p.m. Quick Review

In the previous hour, Eric Carter went full-blown insubordinate teenager after CTU Director Mullins told Carter "you're grounded." With Twisted Sister's "We're Not Gonna Take It" blasting in his head, Carter: a) stole the plans to a anti-aircraft weapons system (CLASSIFIED), b) sprung his criminal war buddy, Grimes, out of CTU jail and c) Took dad's (Mullins') SUV out for a spin with Grimes- to go meet up with an arms dealer named Gabriel, who might have a lead on Jadalla bin Khalid's location and operations. Kids these days...

The internet made this, not me.
Before meeting up with Gabriel, Carter and Grimes stop off at a de-badged Valero gas station (I know this because I am a serious petrol shopper) so Carter can run into the mini mart to buy Grimes a shaving kit. When Carter returns to the SUV, Grimes immediately starts trimming his beard in the passenger seat. I don't know how you all live your lives, but I happen to be picky on what a passenger does in the car I'm driving. Even if it's a stolen car, I think I'd shut down Grimes' "road shave" immediately. Carter doesn't look pleased with Grimes' sudden need to groom, but I guess Carter is putting national security ahead of car etiquette.  I say that these two subjects are not mutually exclusive, dammit!

Campbell's new Terrorist Soup!
Back at Decapitation High, the Chechen Murderess (Amira!) gets picked up from the hospital by her terrorist brother, Khasan. They talk about terrorist school stuff, terrorist art class, etc. when suddenly their father (not a terrorist) surprises them with a drop-by visit. Immediately, Amira offers to make their father some food and Khasan whispers loudly to his sister "Dad can't be here, we have terrorist responsibilities!" Their father knows that his kids are up to no good, but he's also hungry, so he lets Amira make kharcho, which Wikipedia tells me is "a traditional Georgian soup originating in Mingrelia containing beef, rice, cherry plum purée and chopped English walnut (Juglans regia)." Now, not to argue with 24's writers, but kharcho is not some Lipton's instant soup, it takes HOURS to make. Why not offer to make papa some Beef Wellington or Posole Rojo? Hey kid, if you applied yourself to school half as much as you do to cooking for your dad, you'd get a scholarship to Harvard! Anyway, while the soup is cooking, Khasan starts punching their dad viciously the moment they start arguing over the merits of terrorism. I did not like watching this scene, it was sad and unnerving. I mean, how's papa gonna eat the soup with his mouth and arms all covered in duct-tape?

Speaking of fathers, Major Dad (a friend to terrorists) arrives at CTU, after Ingram tells Nilaa that she's innocent and free to go. Senator Jimmy Smits is there to observe his dad being interrogated by his wife, Major Dad's daughter-in-law. AGAIN, I want to reiterate that I am not a federal agent, I am a simple cave man who, wait that's my beloved reader Cirroc's line. My point is this- how is Ingram allowed to run this part of the investigation? And why would she want to do it? Well, maybe Mullins was busy telling Andy he's fired to bother with Major Dad. The scene devolves quickly into Smits storming into the room to yell at his dad, who's denying even knowing what a "Jabbadahutt" is or how to make kharcho from scratch, but he does opine that goose is the preferred meat base, or so he read in Cook's Country Kitchen. LIAR! YOU EAT SOUP WITH TERRORISTS! WHERE'S THE LADLE?!

Oh, and how can I forget the Nicole/Isaac dramedy! Here are the Cliff's Notes: 1) Isaac is slapping people around asking "Did you know I was gonna get whacked at the drug deal?" 2) One of Isaac's pals, Andre (who has a cataract in his left eye) tells Nicole "Isaac has had a hard time selling drugs ever since you left the neighborhood with Eric." 3) Nicole tries to get Isaac to open up about his feelings, Isaac pushes Nicole to the ground in front of the guys 4) Isaac apologizes to Nicole, Nicole softens up a little, gets in close to him like she wants to start making out and says stone-cold "Don't ever put your hands on me again."  There, you're caught up.

OOPS! Looks like the arms dealer in the middle forgot his firearm!
Mercifully, Carter and Grimes make it to the meet with Gabriel. Turns out, Grimes is in 50 boxes of ziti to Gabriel for some money Grimes lost at a heroin dealer's house-- money which should have actually gone to an arms dealer. Jeez, you can't trust a mentally unstable war vet with fifty thousand dollars anymore, can you? Gabriel shoots Grimes and then talks to Carter about the weapons plans (CLASSIFIED) that he stole. Did I also mention that Gabriel has an eye condition as well? It might have something to do with the HUGE SCAR going down Gabriel's face, over his left eye (same damaged eye as Andre, who is probably not related to Gabriel).  Carter knows we've had to endure some weird stuff in this hour and we are HUNGRY FOR ACTION! Carter grabs a gun, and calls up CTU ("Hey Mullins, I know I'm grounded but come on over so we can arrest bad guys!"). Mullins promises Carter that Locke will show up with a tac team before this episode is done, so we've been promised violence.

Before Locke and his team can get to Carter, Gabriel tries to make a run for it. Carter does something beautiful in this moment- he kills the guys who don't matter but shoots Gabriel in the leg! Why don't we see more of this in movies/TV shows? Everyone's always killing the "only lead we've got!" in the confusion of a gunfight. While I'm busy congratulating Carter for being awesome, Gabriel pulls out a knife and slits his OWN throat to prevent being captured. Note- Gabriel said to Carter "I don't deal with terrorists" beforehand, and somehow, I believe Gabriel. Whatever they manage to recover from Gabriel's computer, I think it will be about an entirely different threat.

Speaking of IT matters, Jadalla bin Khalid's people have only partially pulled some terrorist cell information- cat photos, coupon codes for Sports Authority and Radio Shack (USELESS!). One of bin Khalid's mentors jumps the gun and activates a cell instead of waiting to contact all 15 cells, as bin Khalid intended.So, bin Khalid shoots his mentor in front of the crew.  Did I mention that the activated cell is Amira's?

Next week, Amira(!) continues to have doubts but disregards them in pursuit of terrorism AND hopefully, Carter gets reunited with his CarterClutch™.
Hey mom- have you seen my bag? Did I check if I am wearing it? Uhh... Gotta go, love you, bye!

4 comments:

Kaden Alflow said...

Hey, it's Spencer! Glad you're reviewing this show. Glad some things are finally happening and bodies are dropping. Glad Ben Grimes finally died. It took 5 episodes and a shave, but it was worth the wait. We should be getting Tony back any week now.

Granny Annie said...

I still got the creeps from him clipping that beard hair in the car. Once more you turn the episode into a fine affair

TheJackSack said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
TheJackSack said...

@Spencer: Welcome back! I'm so happy to hear from you. Grimes' beard was the only thing keeping him alive, apparently. Your theory on this matter is scientific and sound. Almeida is coming soon, not next week, but SOON.

@Annie: Grimes was aptly-named. Good riddance, and maybe we'll get a scene next week where a CTU valet is cleaning out the SUV and suddenly realizes it's full of beard hair. Poor guy!

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