Editor's note: BauerLuver strikes again! She offers a brilliant, frantic review of one of the best episodes from Season 1. I really love what you're about to read:
Greetings, fellow Twentyfourers! I have the next weekly dose of the Jack Bauer Power Hour. Previously on 24, Jack went to some National Park, George cracked more sarcasm, and David made a big speech. With relish that the Keith-Amnesia-Kim-is-with-the-drug-dealers storylines have finally ended, let us begin...
It's dinner time, folks! Maybe to us, but not to the characters of 24. Jack n' George investigate what looks like an abandoned golf course. They've been told that at 7:20, the power will be shut down in that location. George, of course, starts to lose heart in this information when he doesn't get instant results, and saunters back home leaving Jack to dig up whatever he can find. I'm liking this George guy less and less. In fact, if he didn't have a sense of humor, I would downright hate him.
Fresh of his stunning save, Tony is left to reap his reward by hawling a hysterical Teri and a wounded Creepo Doctor into his van. He calls Nina, they talk dirt, they hang up. Teri is downright screaming for Kim, and Tony ends up yelling, "TERI, GET IN THE CAR!" Seriously woman, get a grip will ya? Look? Alright? Yha? That's when we hear Tony mumbling, "I don't get paid enough to do this job..."
Down at the old slammer, Kim and Rick are put in handcuffs. Rick FINALLY decides to back Kim up and they agree to tell the police everything that has happened. Ignore the "hallelujah" chorus you hear in the background. Meanwhile, David gives Nicole the same ten speeches he's already given Keith, but reworded. But hey, at least she's in good hands! But then we get a little smackdown with Sherry, who marches in with the same yimmer yammer like before, about how the world will end if David tells the truth. She says, "I hope your conscience helps you when this is all over." David retorts back, "You mean the campaign or us?" Guys, this is big. This perfect couple has been at each other's throats all day, but they never actually talked about splitting up before. My goodness.
Jackanial Baueroone (Daniel Boone + Jack Bauer) marches fearlessly through the wilderness, and he just happens to notice something a bit funny. There is a passageway in the ground (if any of you have seen LOST, it's like the hatch) made of concrete. Ahhhhndre Drazen and his minions unfortunately already know that Jack is there, and this strobe light and alarm suddenly blare on, and Jack yells and there are soldiers and stuff and an unconscious Jack is dragged away. Security has a may of making a guy feel welcome, you know?
Jack wakes up, and pukes. (gross.) A guy comes in who looks suspiciously like that Spanish matinance man from earlier in the day. Not only does Jack learn that this place is an underground detention center (how cool is that?) but also that an unidentified prisoner is arriving at the important time- 7:20. Jack tells Matinance Man to prepare this place for battle. The plot has just majorly thickened! The SWAT bad guy soldier people prepare for battle to, but even Ahhhndre can't deny being a little antsy since Alexis hasn't called back. As Jillian Michaels said, "If you fail to plan, you plan to fail."
Jack's homemade army of janitors prepares to look like they know what they're doing as a chopper holding the mysterious prisoner lands on the chopper patch. As Jack brings in the suspect, not only is Ahhhndre's army reluctant to attack because they see added recruits, but the power never goes off (I actually don't know how Jack stopped this). Ahhhhndre stands down, and zeee priisonerrr eeees seecurre!
(and the lights are on!)
Kim does a horrible job of explaining herself to the police officer, but let's face it, we didn't expect anything better, did we? She does have the sense to tell the officer to call CTU, which hopefully he will. Down in the dungeons, Jack tries to weedle his way into interrogating the prisoner, but of course, it is denied. So that leaves Jack with two options: a) go rouge, or b) get DOD Matinance Man to call his people. It'll probably end up being both. :)
Jack slips into a random control office, taps a few buttons, and just as he gets caught, sees who the prisoner is on the screen. Guess what, folks? Victor Drazen is alive and kicking! This is quite the twist, and Jack takes it about as well as I might! Of course, this raises the question, why would Victor's sons want to avenge their father who is already alive? I think we'll find the answer soon.
Jack has another arm wrestle with DOD Matinence, who concludes that their next move should be making phone calls. Jack disagrees because Jack is a step above the average mortal man. Oh, and it turns out that Drazen's sons know that their father is alive, and decide to use C5 to blast a way in. I suppose they're just trying to make up for their previous lack of Father's Day gifts, right?
Nina takes the whiplash from George all for asking why he hasn't told Jack about his family. This really annoys me, Nina has the most sense on this show past Jack and David! And yet she gets punted around like a football at that dimly lit office of hers. One observation I've noticed is how obsessed she is with Jack. I mean, she's always trying to do anything to make the man happy! And honestly, she seems to care very little for Tony, who she kind of has as a backup man in case Jack is gone or something. The DAh-Rah-Mah.
Yeah, guess what: it turns out Sherry was wrong. Seems like telling the truth is the latest fashion these days! David's numbers actually increase and I'm serious, if he doesn't end up president, I'll eat my hat. At the Presidential Hotel, at little par-tae is being thrown in honor of David's awesomeness. We then get another juicy David- Sherry scene, and behold: David doesn't love or trust Sherry anymore! Penny Johnson Gerald is amazing in this scene as she comes back saying, (in a very dramatic voice) "Well, David, you may not love me but you'll never leave me." David is kinda like, "Watch me." I just can't believe it! How can this couple seriously break up? They're soulmates! Sherry would have to do something really diabolical before I could ever think that they should actually break up.
Down in the Chamber of Secrets, Jack gets the go (sort of) to interrogate Victor Drazen. Yeeeees! Dennis Hopper gives a smashing performance as the Bosnian nationalist, and as Jack tries to convince him to call off the attack, he refuses. (I suddenly have a future vision of another man Jack will also interrogate in a holding room and have believed he was dead --- Omgsh spolier alert!) Jack concludes that Victor won't talk, and prepares to move his men and Drazen out. But this isn't done without complications -- our last scene features men moving into the prison. "Thhhherre hhheeerrree," says Drazen in his native tongue, Vampirenese, with oily relish.
Another strong episode. This detention facility is super cool, I actually just feel like an agent myself by watching it! The Sherry -- David breakup update, however, seems a little unbelievable to me. I don't think hiding huge secrets from your spouse is OK, but to throw away 24 ---I mean 25, years of marriage for a problem that's already been solved? Sherry (or David) would have to do something truly evil for me to buy it. Nice action + interrogation + Less Teri and Kim + Super spy underground prison = Thrilling 24! Thanks y'all for tuning in! Only one more disc (sniff) till the season's done!
Editor's note: Watching this episode, I began to realize, sadly, how much I'll miss Dennis Hopper. He brought a level of theater to his villain that was borderline comical, but still very intimidating. It's an underrated performance from a great actor. Thanks again, BL- you had me laughing throughout your awesome review!